Fatih…. what does it take?

I remember while working my second job thinking each and EVERYDAY “God, why me? You have such faith in me and my work and yet I feel so discouraged, tried and ready to just give up. What can I do???”  I remember in a split moment that God talked to me about faith… I had so much faith in Him and Him in me, yet I was able to talk the talk but not walk the walk…. He said to me, “You have so much faith that I’ll do right by you, yet you will not just “let go”…. you won’t take a leap of faith…..

That’s what I had to do… leap….

Matthew 17:20  He replied, “Because you have so little faith. Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.”

What was so different with me that I couldn’t have that faith. In a matter of time, I put a mustard seed on my name tag that was attached to my scrubs everynight knowing that God was waiting on me to make the first move and he would get me in place… every since that night I have turned in my 2 weeks notice, left that job, been home more and more involved with my family. I was missing out on so much. I can’t tell you how really down I felt some night because I felt like I didn’t know my kids anymore after over 2 yrs of being gone all day / night essentially to feel like I didn’t know what my kids like to eat, how they went to sleep, etc. But I did this on the weekends, wasn’t that enough? 😦

It took time… faith, prayer…. God knew I needed this and my family needed this.

Thank you God for change in my life and my families life… that’s all it took and I wore that and I presented that… mustard seed…..

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